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I'm worried about Polites.

Generally, I eat breakfast with Macar, Misenus, Polites and Elpenor. However, today Polites was absent. -While making my morning rounds, I found him standing at the bow.

Not thinking much of it, I tossed a chunk of salted pork at his head. It hit him squarely, but he only shot me a weak smile.

Taking that as a bad sign, I grabbed some breakfast and brought it to him. He thanked me, but just set it down. After a few moments he turned back to the waves.

I started back to my cabin, but then thought otherwise.

Heading back to the bow, I did my best to break the ice. "What the hell is the matter with you, Polites?" I asked.

Acting surprised, Polites assured me that he was fine.

I just nodded and leaned against the bullwark.

Several minutes passed where we just quietly watched the waves. At one point a seagull shat in front of us, and it almost hit me. -Polites snickered at that, which made me feel better.

We stood for a few more minutes in silence. Finally, Polites raised his bandaged hand and spoke: "They got me again Eurylochus. The Trojans shot my same fucking hand."

"Yeah. That's pretty crazy." I laughed.

However, I then noticed Polites eyes were welling up with tears.

Quickly becoming emotional, Polites continued: "My same fucking hand! It's fucking mangled, Eurylochus. I mean, what is that?! It's some kind of sign, isn't it?"

I have to admit, I was confused. Polites isn't a very religious guy, and I couldn't see why he was so upset. Yes, getting shot in his bad hand sucked, but it could have been much worse.

Trying to cheer him up, I patted him on the shoulder and told him so.

It didn't work. In fact, Polites just completely broke down.

At first he started going off about how he looked like a crab, and then started wailing that he didn't think he was going to make it home. -I couldn't understand everything, but he seemed to have some sort of premonition or something.

I tried to give Polites a pat on the back, but he immediately grabbed hold of me. Clutching me like a baby, he began to sob uncontrollably. -Polites and I are old friends, but this made me a bit uncomfortable.

Considering his emotional state, I didn't want to pry him off. However, Polites was wailing like a little girl, and he was definitely making a scene.

As swiftly as I could, I walked Polites back to my quarters. He didn't try to stop me, but he didn't help me either. The entire time, he just continued crying and babbling about how he knew he was doomed. I think at some point Polites even said that he 'wanted his mommy'. -It was pretty bad.

To make matters worse, we passed Odysseus and Elpenor on our way back.

Odysseus is very uncomfortable about displays of emotion, and immediately turned his attention to cuss out some soldiers who paused in scrubbing the deck.

Elpenor asked if Polites was alright. Frustrated, I told him to 'just fuck off', which surprised us both.

After I got Polites to my cabin, I didn't stay to console him. He had embarrassed me enough, and the last thing I wanted was to spend a lot of time in my quarters with him. I just sat him on my bed, and headed back to the deck as quickly as I could.

Purposefully making myself visible to all, I went to give my morning report to Odysseus. -Elpenor immediately found something else to do.

Anyway, for the rest of the morning, Odysseus and I walked the deck and talked about what needed to be done to prepare the fleet for an attack.

Baius expects it will be five or six days before we reach Ismara. -We'd get there sooner if it weren't for our Milesian barge.

The General doesn't think the Ciconians have any reason to expect us. For that reason, we are going to try to come ashore at night. Thankfully, Odysseus simply intends to raid Ismara and then to leave. I was relieved to hear that. -At this point, I don't think we could even suggest a siege to our men.

Odysseus was obviously pleased to talk to me about his plan and he was in good spirits by the time we broke for lunch. -I didn't bring up Polites, and for that I am sure the General was grateful.

I spent the rest of the day playing Alquerque with Misenus. I hadn't played since I lost to Agamemnon, and I was happy to beat him a couple of times.

It wasn't until late in the evening before I dared to return to my quarters. As I hadn't heard from Polites at all, I was half-expecting to find him dead on the floor.

Fortunately he was fast asleep on my cot. -The bastard drained three jugs of my wine.

On my desk I found a letter. Judging by the handwriting, it was written after Polites had gotten himself very drunk. This is what he wrote:

Laodice,

I remember what you said. You wouldn't be proud of me. My hand looks even more like a claw. Laodice, I saw him on the beach and I let him go. I saw Athena when we ran into the temple down your street. She looked at me like you did. She told me my fate was sealed. Ciconians didn't shoot my hand, She did. I'm so sorry about your husband. About everything. If I get back, I'll go to Athens and kill that bastard myself. If She lets me. It was like a dream. Like a burning dream. You burned, Laodice. I'll drown.

I have no idea what that is all about. -I never heard Polites speak of anyone called Laodice.

Anyway, after hiding his letter, I roused Polites and sent him off to his own bunk.

I was really looking forward to a nice cup of wine tonight.